SPAIN, Carlos Sáinz de los Terreros •
Last Sunday, October 23, we met with couples who had participated in the different sessions of the Workshop for the Strengthening of Marriage (FORTA). Since the first event in September 2015, there have already been nine of them in Spain, in which more than two hundred couples have participated. —
FORTA has been an unforgettable experience for all who have participated. But there is a catch: once it has been participated, it cannot be repeated. In response to the concern expressed by many participants, we have begun to organize these POSTFORTA meetings. The goal is to continue to deepen some of the aspects that help us improve our marriage, to share experiences, and ultimately to broaden the experience of a healthy Christian marriage in a society that needs it so much.
So many things distract us…
We realize that we still have a lot of work to do. The FORTA weekends were very rich in teachings, in a deep encounter with our spouse, in knowing our history as a couple, in understanding that marriage is a matter of three and Christ is with us. But later we also notice all the things we have neglected, pulled down by a routine that makes us lose sight of the immense gift of the person who shares our lives. There are many things that distract us from what should be our main concern when we wake up each day: making each other happy and goading each other to reach heaven.
Sometimes it’s work, sometimes it’s money, sometimes it’s family, sometimes it’s the environment around us, sometimes it’s caring for our children for whom we don’t always act as one and who sometimes become distancing factors instead of acting as the unifying element and vital cement of any marriage. Or we find it difficult to recognize the constant presence of Christ by our side, who makes our marriage more than an ordinary human project; for he transforms it into a sacrament.
The POSTFORTA meetings
The tasks initiated in FORTA often remain only in outline, without extending the efforts that would be necessary to make the most of them, which would permanently change our life together. It is not due to laziness or lack of interest, it may be due to lack of time or because life overtakes us, but in any case we miss an opportunity to continue what was started during that magical weekend that we all experienced.
For all these reasons, some couples have started this initiative to meet again. Led by Charo and Alvaro Obando and with the collaboration of many others, these POSTFORTA sessions were created, of which two have already been held in 2022.
Exchange of experiences between couples
In the last event this Sunday, the focus was on dialogue, sharing experiences between couples in different life situations and opening a possibility to live together. We also tried to discover the main concerns through everyone’s testimonies and possible ways to respond to them.
In the process, we discovered the unexpected and outstanding acting skills of Cristina and Álvaro, who very vividly portrayed some of the situations that everyone present could recognize as their own. And this served to enrich a long time of exchanges of each couple alone and later in groups, which served to share and learn from others. And why not say it to feel better accompanied in our shortcomings and weaknesses. From my personal experience, this opportunity to meet people with different backgrounds, charisms and spiritualities has given me perspectives and experiences that I take with me and that I am convinced will make me better as a husband and as a person.
No one wanted to leave
We ended the meeting with a Eucharistic celebration that Father Jaime celebrated with words that touched our hearts. We will never be able to properly thank him for being there for us despite the wind and weather. And of course, as it cannot be otherwise at FORTA, we ended with a pleasant conviviality around the good food (and drink) generously provided by all the participants, during which we enjoyed ourselves well and for a long time, even though many of us had to work the next day. But it was so good that no one wanted to leave.
Original: Spanish. Translation: Maria Fischer @schoenstatt.org
